Travel To England
1. Don’t plan anything, just order the
plane tickets and you’re off.
2. Accidentally meet a Norwegian woman
on the plane who recommends a cosy little town.
3. Rent a car.
4. Drive to the town using a really bad
map printed off of Google.
5. Get to the town and find out that
they have a “regatta day”, so all bed&breakfast/hotels are full.
6. Walk depressed and hungry along the
street at nine in the night looking for something to eat.
7. Bump into a random Englishman
telling you where there’s a cebab place.
8. Tell him your situation.
9. Have the random Englishman offer you
a bed in his house.
10. Make sure the Englishman that picks
you up is so hospitable that he lets you eat his food at home and pays for your
lunch out in the town (which ends up being so big you don’t need dinner).
11. Spend two days at his house, not
having to spend any money at all on food/bed.
12. Drive to Southend to settle into the
house you rented for the year.
